Aimer - to like, to enjoy, to love... and to be in love

August 2014 Lesson: The Verb Aimer
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Aimer - to like, to enjoy, to love... and to be in love
The verb Aimer means a lot of things in French; to like, to enjoy, to love, as well as to be in love. It is very
important that you know how to use it correctly so you avoid embarrassing mistakes.
1 – To say to like or enjoy something or someone, use the verb Aimer with an adverb.
Let’s see how to talk about feelings from total dislike to great friendship, keeping it all on a friendship level.
We are talking about friends here, not being in love.
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Je déteste Paul - I hate Paul
Je n’aime pas Paul - I don’t like Paul
Je n’aime pas beaucoup Paul - I don’t like Paul much
J’aime assez Paul – I kind of like Paul – he is Ok with me - it’s rather positive
J’aime bien Paul - I like Paul – this is the one you need to memorize to say “like” for friendship
J’aime beaucoup Paul - I really like Paul, I’m fond of him – as a friend.
J’adore Paul - I loooooove Paul (but still as a friend)
2 – When you use the construction Aimer + person’s name, without any adverb, it means that you
are in love with that person.
Compare :
• J’aime Paul - I am in love with Paul (love)
• J’aime beaucoup Paul - I like Paul a lot (friend)
So I know this is a bit weird: no adverb at all will end up being a stronger feeling, being in love, than a construction with
“beaucoup” which stays on a friendship level.
Many French love songs and movies have a dialogue along these lines:
- Est-ce que tu m’aimes ?
- Euh…. je t’aime beaucoup…
- Are you in love with me ?
- Well…I like you a lot…
Or to quote the song from Zazie, “Chanson d’ami” from the album “Made in Love”:
“Je ne t’aime pas: je t’aime bien” “I am not in love with you: I like you”
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T hin k Fre nch - août 2 0 1 4
3 – Exception:
You can use aimer without an adverb with your immediate family (parents, siblings, children, pets) to say that you
love them (not that you are in love with them), but NEVER with your friends. People would understand if you said
“j’aime mon frère” that you love your brother, but are not in love with him. But if you said of your friend Paul “j’aime
Paul”, they would understand that you are saying that you are in love with him. Use “j’adore Paul, j’aime beaucoup
Paul”.
Note that if you really wanted to be clear, you could use the expression “être amoureux/amoureuse de” (careful,
not “être en amour” which they use in Canada, but not in France). “J’aime beaucoup Paul, mais je ne suis pas
amoureuse de lui.” It’s a bit redundant, but it’s very clear :-)
4 – Notes:
Contrast:
• Je l’aime – I am in love with him / I am in love with her.
• Je l’aime bien – I like him/her
If someone asks “Est-ce que vous aimez le vin?” (do you like wine in general), you cannot answer “oui je l’aime”.
You have to say “oui, j’aime ça”.
When talking about things “in general”, either repeat the thing in your anwer, or use “ça”. You may use an adverb to
modify your verb, it’s more eloquent.
• Est-ce que tu aimes le vin ? (wine in general)
• Oui, j’aime beaucoup le vin.
• Or oui, j’aime beaucoup ça.
But you cannot replace “le vin” in it’s general value by a direct object pronoun like le or les. I don’t know why.
When talking about a precise thing, it’s OK to use a direct object pronoun. And much more common to answer with
an adverb to modify aimer.
Est-ce que tu aimes ce vin rouge ? Oui, je l’aime beaucoup.
I would not say “oui, je l’aime”. Maybe it’s just me, but it doesn’t sound good to my ear.
5 – Use your adverbs to nuance “aimer”:
When someone asks you if you like something/someone, it’s customary to offer a nuance in your answer and use an
adverb.
• Est-ce que tu aimes le vin ?
• “Oui, j’aime le vin.” Is a little flat… childish almost. We’d use “bien, beaucoup…” to nuance the answer.
Except when you are talking about being in love with someone, as discussed above…
6 – The word for love
Is l’amour. But what is so weird about it is that it is masculine in the singular, and feminine in the plural !!!
Un grand amour = a big love
Des amours tumultueuses = difficult love
7 – Would you like
Finally, to ask the question “would you like to…” we don’t use the verb “aimer”, but the verb “vouloir – to want”.
It’s yet another example of why translating doesn’t work.
w w w. t h i n k f re n c h . c o m
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